You have met an interesting woman online. You two had a great time chatting online and she decided to give you her phone number. Now you have to make her want to see you face to face, and the phone is your only tool.
The first telephone call is the most important one. Sure, you have her number, but nothing has been won yet. This first call is your chance to make a memorable impression and pave the way for a face-to-face meeting.
1. Prepare for the Call
Before you call, you should have prepared a list of several topics to talk about. This preparation is crucial. Hopefully, your email exchange has provided you with some information to follow up on. Review your previous conversations to identify any common interests or intriguing details she mentioned.
Study her profile carefully. Look for additional topics to discuss based on her interests and hobbies. Think about open-ended questions that will encourage her to share more about herself. For example, if she mentioned liking a particular type of music, you might ask her about her favorite bands or concerts she’s attended.
Prepare to steer the conversation naturally. Start talking about a subject, and give her a chance to speak as well. The key is to keep the conversation balanced and engaging, allowing both of you to contribute equally.
2. DON’T: Avoid Sensitive Topics
DON’T ask her questions about other guys she’s seeing. This is a surefire way to make her uncomfortable. It’s invasive and can come across as insecure. Your focus should be on getting to know her better, not on who else might be in her life.
DON’T interrogate her about how she spends her time. Questions that feel like an interrogation can make her defensive. Instead, let her share what she feels comfortable sharing. Remember, how she spends her time is her business.
Also, DON’T angrily reprimand her for flaking on you. If she hasn’t responded as quickly as you’d like, don’t confront her about it. This can come across as controlling and disrespectful. A respectful approach will always be more effective.
A lot of men sabotage their chances by not giving her enough credit and respect. Show her that you value her time and opinions. A respectful attitude creates a positive and engaging atmosphere for the conversation.
3. Enjoy the Conversation
You know there’s trouble if you’re doing all the talking and her replies are short or non-existent. This likely means you haven’t hit on the right topic or she simply isn’t interested. If she’s not engaged, it’s important to read the signs and adapt your approach.
If she ends the conversation early or “has to go,” it’s best to leave it up to her to call you again, if she wants to. Usually, she won’t. If she’s not interested in continuing the conversation, it’s best to move on.
So, when talking to a woman on the phone, DON’T worry about impressing her. Focus on having fun and enjoying the conversation. Amuse yourself and keep the interaction light and engaging. A relaxed and enjoyable chat is far more attractive than trying too hard to impress.
4. Compliments and Timing
At first phone conversation, it’s better to stay away from complimenting her. Compliments can be powerful, but timing is everything. When you give a woman compliments within the context of trying to win her over, you risk coming across as insincere.
Usually, women are curious about why the men they are talking to online chose them. They may ask you why you picked them out of many profiles. This is your chance to offer genuine compliments. Wait for these moments to share your thoughts about what you find appealing about her.
If the conversation flows easily and effortlessly and you find her fairly responsive, and you can keep up the conversation for at least a half hour, you can ask her out. Her positive response will be a good sign. If she’s interested, she’ll likely agree to meet you in person.
Very nice.