we’re going to explore something powerful. I’m going to share a tool that can shift your emotions from feeling nervous, anxious, or scared to feeling empowered, energized, and motivated within a few seconds. Stay tuned because this lesson is going to be a lot of fun!
Let’s start by debunking a common myth: the idea that all successful people are always confident. It’s easy to believe that if you ever experience self-doubt, there’s something wrong with you. But this couldn’t be further from the truth.
As part of my job, I’ve had the privilege of coaching elite athletes, including those who have won World Cups and achieved incredible success. Yet, despite their accomplishments, they struggle with self-doubt almost daily. I’ve also coached celebrities—the ones you see in movies, who make tons of money. But when you talk to them privately, they are often full of self-doubt. Entrepreneurs who have built and sold their businesses for millions of dollars? They also grapple with self-doubt.
Out of all the people I’ve ever coached, the most stubborn and challenging client I’ve ever had is… myself. Yes, despite having all the tools, I still need to coach myself daily. Self-doubt has played a significant role in my life, influencing my decisions and actions in profound ways.
The Impact of Self-Doubt
Self-doubt once caused me to coach elite athletes for free for an entire year because I didn’t believe I was qualified enough—I wasn’t a sports psychologist. It also led me to postpone having children for 10 years after getting married because I thought I didn’t have what it takes to be a good mom. Self-doubt nearly stopped me from writing my first book because I believed it wasn’t good enough and that nobody would read it. Eventually, I pushed through those doubts, and the book did really well. It sold half a million copies and won awards. But when it came time to write my second book, guess what? All those self-doubts came rushing back.
My message to you is that it’s okay to have self-doubt. It’s not the self-doubt itself that’s the problem; the problem arises when you allow those doubts to dictate your actions. When you’re pursuing a big dream and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, it’s natural to feel nervous and unsure. The key is to master your emotions rather than let them control you.
Mastering Your Emotions
Mastering your emotions might sound like a daunting task, and it is a significant challenge. I’ve taught at the university level and even had a class called “Mastering Your Emotions.” So, I know this subject is big and complex, and we could spend hours discussing it. But today, I want to share with you one tool that can produce the fastest change in your emotions when you need to shift from feeling nervous, frustrated, or anxious to feeling empowered and ready within minutes.
I discovered the power of this tool 13 years ago, during one of the most challenging moments of my professional career. I had just signed on as a speaker with Sony Music, and the president decided that my opening night should be held at one of the most iconic theaters in Buenos Aires. If you’ve ever been to Buenos Aires, you’ve probably heard of the Teatro Colón. It’s a theater where the world’s greatest ballet dancers perform and where the best opera singers showcase their talent. For some reason, the president of Sony Music thought it would be a good idea for me to have my opening night there.
I was both excited and nervous. I remember walking into this majestic theater for the first time. It was massive, and as I stood there during a rehearsal, checking the lights and sound, I closed my eyes and visualized the entire theater filled with people. As I was doing this, a man walked up to me. He introduced himself as someone who had been running the theater for almost 40 years.
He asked me, “What kind of artist are you? Are you a singer?”
“No,” I replied.
“A musician?”
“No.”
“An actress?”
“No.”
“A dancer?”
“No.”
By this point, I was trying to make him smile by joking that I had some moves after a few drinks. But he wasn’t amused. He asked again, “What kind of artist are you?”
“I’m a motivational speaker,” I said.
He looked at me like I had just landed from Mars. “And people are going to pay to come and listen to you speak in this theater?”
“Yes,” I replied, with a fake smile and a false sense of confidence.
The moment he walked away, I felt like a huge bag of doubt had been dropped on my head. What if this guy was right? What if nobody showed up? What if this was all a huge mistake? Who would pay to listen to me speak?
The next two or three weeks were a long, anxiety-filled struggle. I couldn’t sleep, tossing and turning all night. I was snapping at my children for no reason. I even experienced physical symptoms like anxiety-induced diarrhea. It was not pretty. At one point, I considered canceling the whole event. We were just 10 days away, and no tickets had been sold. I was ready to give up.
But then, I remembered a powerful mantra I had learned from Jack Canfield many years earlier. He told me, “Whenever you’re going for something big and you feel nervous or full of doubt, use this mantra. It’s powerful, and it will shift your emotions instantly.”
The Power of the Mantra
I decided to give it a try. This mantra might just be the push I needed to overcome my doubts. So, I want to share this mantra with you because you might be on the verge of something big, and those self-doubts are creeping in. Here’s what I want you to do:
First, close your eyes and take a deep breath. Think about your big dream. Get in touch with those uncomfortable feelings of self-doubt and anxiety. Now, let’s start chanting the mantra together. It goes like this:
“Oh, what the heck! Go for it anyway.”
Let’s say it again, louder this time:
“Oh, what the heck! Go for it anyway.”
Now, imagine we’re holding an energy ball. We’re going to bounce it from the floor to the sky. Ready? Here we go:
“Oh, what the heck! Go for it anyway!”
Repeat it a few times, really let it sink in. You’re doing great! Give yourself a round of applause.
I know this might sound a bit silly, but it’s not a joke. Sometimes, you need to push yourself even when you’re scared. You have to act in spite of your fear. That’s what I did.
Facing the Challenge Head-On
Finally, the opening night arrived. My mother and I were standing backstage, wondering if anyone had shown up. We had no idea because tickets were sold on the spot, so we wouldn’t know until we stepped on stage. We started hearing voices, and we thought, “Well, at least someone came.”
I’ll never forget the moment when the red velvety curtain started to rise. As it opened fully, our jaws dropped. We had a full house—sold-out tickets! And the audience gave us the longest, loudest standing ovation I could have ever dreamed of.
The lesson for me was incredibly powerful: It’s okay to feel anxious and scared before doing something big. What’s not okay is letting those emotions stop you from taking action. Use this mantra to push yourself through the fear, the anxiety, and the self-doubt.
The more you use it, the more confident you’ll become as you move forward. Remember, it’s not about eliminating self-doubt; it’s about not letting it control you.
