Jealousy is a whole bundle of feelings that tend to get lumped together. It is one of the most destructive and painful emotions in a dating relationship. Jealousy is about fear of losing power or control in a relationship. Jealousy is sweet sometimes, but only in moderation. Too much jealousy can destroy a relationship because it drives a wedge between the two people involved.
You have been in a relationship for a long time with an amazing girl. You love her very much, but the problem is that she is very jealous, which causes a lot of arguments. You don’t want to lose her, so you have to deal with it.
But she is overreacting: she calls you in the middle of the night to make sure you are at home. She checks your mobile phone, calls you when you go out with your friends to see where you are and how long you will stay. She becomes very angry when she sees you looking at or talking to any other girl.
She gets suspicious and makes accusations that are not all heartfelt. She teases you a lot and accuses you of being unfaithful, even if there is no basis for her to think this way. After a while, you have had enough of all this, but you are ready to make all the sacrifices you can to understand her and make her stop with all these behaviors.
Why Jealousy Happens
There are many reasons we feel jealous, and though it is a normal human emotion to feel, jealousy often comes from insecurity. Maybe she is afraid that you will see another girl and suddenly like her more than you like her. So, try not to give her many reasons to feel jealous.
Avoid looking at other girls in her presence. Don’t compare her with other girls. Don’t exclude her from your future plans, and avoid having female best friends. If you already have a best female friend and don’t want to lose either of them, you should try meeting them both and helping them become friends.
How to Deal with a Jealous Girlfriend
No matter the reasons why she feels jealous, you should try to understand why she feels that way. As an example, maybe she can’t deal with the fact that before her, you had a girlfriend — your first girlfriend, with whom you stayed longer than with her. You loved your ex, but it ended because she betrayed you. But your current girlfriend doesn’t want to accept that and continues to be jealous of her.
Explain to her that she has to accept that we all have a past and move on because that past isn’t going to change. Assure her that she is the only one for you.
Maybe all of us who have been in a relationship for some time and love our partner are sometimes a little jealous. Think about it: how would you feel if you saw her at school or work, talking with other guys, and then she comes and tells you how great they are? Wouldn’t you be jealous? Or maybe there are some people around her that you don’t like and don’t trust, and then you find yourself feeling jealous too.
A little bit of jealousy is healthy, but in her case, where she is overreacting, she may need some help from you to get over it.
Effective Communication is Key
The best thing you can do to deal with your jealous girlfriend and not break up with her is to talk sincerely with her. Tell her how you feel. Be faithful to her and explain that you know relationships are based on trust, so you are going to be sincere with her all the time.
Communicate sincerely and with calm, and tell her she needs to get her self-esteem in check because she is splitting you apart. Having a heart-to-heart discussion and explaining to her that all this jealous behavior will drive you away is crucial. Often, an honest exchange of feelings will solve the problem.
The Negative Impact of Jealousy
Jealousy often ruins relationships because it pushes the other partner away more and more with every fight and argument they have. After some time, the partner who is accused all the time has had enough and leaves. But if you really love her and want your relationship to continue, make an agreement together to stop arguing so much. You should not give her so many reasons to be jealous, and she should try not to call you so many times a day.
Building Trust and Confidence
If she calls you at night to check on you, assure her you are where you said you would be. If she checks your phone, be open about it — but also let her know that trust is essential in any relationship. Explain that you are committed to her and only her. If she feels insecure because of your past relationships, remind her that your past is just that — the past.
Tell her that while it is normal to feel a little jealous, excessive jealousy will only hurt both of you. She must learn to trust you, and you must show her that trust is not misplaced.
Reassurance and Understanding
It’s important to reassure her that she is special and that no one else compares to her. Sometimes, jealousy is simply a cry for reassurance and validation. Compliment her, show affection, and make her feel secure in your love. But also, set boundaries to ensure that this does not become a pattern.
If you have female friends, introduce her to them. Make sure she feels included in your life. Transparency can help reduce feelings of jealousy.
Moving Forward Together
Remember, jealousy is natural, but it should not be the dominant emotion in your relationship. By understanding her insecurities and fears, communicating openly, and being patient, you can help her overcome this jealousy. It will take time and effort, but if both of you are committed, it is possible to move forward together.
Focus on building a foundation of trust, love, and mutual respect. With the right approach, you can help her feel more secure and confident in the relationship, leading to a healthier, happier partnership.
