We all have our own mentors—people who, in one way or another, have played a big role and influenced us in the way that we perceive things. At some point in your life, you will also find that what you have done or said has a way of influencing people. In these two cases, you will see that there is a way for you to influence people, and it will benefit you if you know how to use this skill to your advantage.
There is actually no right or wrong way to influence people. The important thing when trying to influence people is that you are going for a positive result. Your success as a leader or part of a group, as well as in life in general, will depend on your ability to influence people and affect their lives in a positive way. To have a deeper understanding of how you can influence people in a positive or productive manner, take a look at the following:
1. Get Your Message Across
Take a manager, for example. If an employee under his supervision is often late arriving to work, how can he influence this employee into improving his or her performance at work? The first thing that the manager needs to do is set a good example. By showing up on time, you are sending the message that you may be the boss, but you are not exempted from the company rules—even with something as simple as coming to work on time. This way, the manager can influence the employee by being a role model and setting a good example.
Example: Imagine a manager named Sarah who notices that her team members are frequently missing deadlines. Instead of reprimanding them, she starts completing her own tasks ahead of schedule and openly shares her workflow strategies during team meetings. By demonstrating her commitment to meeting deadlines, Sarah subtly influences her team to follow suit, resulting in improved productivity across the board.
2. If a Person is Behaving Inappropriately, Dig Deeper into the Reason for Such Behavior
Influencing people into your way of thinking does not—and should not—involve manipulating, bullying, punishing, or harassing. There should be a motivation behind such behavior, and punishing them into submission will not give you the results that you want. Find out what the reason is behind all of it. Listen to their problem and have them explain the situation to you. Only then can you make an intelligent decision and take steps on how you can change their mind into your way of thinking.
Example: Consider a teacher named Mr. Johnson who has a student, Alex, who frequently disrupts the class. Instead of immediately sending Alex to the principal’s office, Mr. Johnson arranges a private conversation to understand Alex’s behavior. He learns that Alex is struggling with issues at home. By addressing these underlying problems and offering support, Mr. Johnson helps Alex to improve his behavior and engagement in class.
3. Explain the Results That You Would Like to See and Get Feedback
If you are a leader in a sales company, for example, you all have a common goal to meet as a company. If your employees think that you are only in it for the money with no deeper motivation, you may not influence them into thinking that they should work hard enough to make the company profit. To influence them into meeting the goals that you have, explain the results that you would like to see. The process should not end here, because you also need to gain feedback to learn if the goals are realistic or if the methods that you want them to use are at all feasible.
Example: A sales manager named Robert wants to boost his team’s performance. Instead of just setting high sales targets, he explains the benefits of achieving these targets, such as bonuses, recognition, and career advancement opportunities. He then asks for feedback on the proposed strategies to ensure they are realistic. This collaborative approach makes the team more invested in achieving the goals, as they feel their input is valued and the targets are attainable.
4. Learn How to Listen and Communicate Effectively to Influence People in a Positive Way
Influencing people is not just limited to the workplace. Even as a parent, you can try to influence your children into living the kind of life that you would like them to have. As a friend, you may not always agree with your friend’s actions, but you should always be there for them to support whatever decisions it is that they make. Listening and learning how to communicate effectively will make you influence others’ lives because of a deeper understanding that you will have on what motivates them, which in turn will give you an idea on how to deal with a particular situation.
Example: A parent named Lisa wants her teenage daughter, Emily, to focus more on her studies. Instead of lecturing Emily about the importance of education, Lisa listens to her concerns and aspirations. She discovers that Emily is passionate about music and feels her studies are getting in the way. By acknowledging Emily’s passion and discussing ways to balance both school and music, Lisa influences Emily to find a healthy balance, leading to improved academic performance and personal satisfaction.
With these in mind, you can learn how to yield positive results in the way that you influence people so that you can be successful in reaching the goals that you have set for yourself and for others.
